I lost my iphone :(

I'd never lost a phone before, ever. Going back to my first cell phone in college. I don't tend to lose things very often, and usually, if I do, the thing has fallen behind something like a bed or shelves.

So when I left my iphone in a cab, I just couldn't believe it. :(

It's really bizarre, but again, I didn't drink much (3 drinks for the whole night, with food), and I came home and was throwing up like crazy, and the whole next day I was about to throw up and exhausted (I took a 4 hour nap). It was again a date, and I was reading online that people are putting eye drops in drinks now, which have a much milder effect than roofies, but do result in throwing up, not feeling well, etc., with some slight memory loss/slowing of heart rate, etc. Eye drops have actually killed people before, so you don't want to mess around with that.

It seems impossible that this could have happened to me twice, but this guy seemed kinda shady, and I was DUMB and again left my drink on the bar and went to the bathroom. It was just really dumb. It was a big drink, and there was no way I could finish it before going to the ladies. But I shouldn't have kept drinking it when I returned.

I couldn't even remember if I had taken a cab home or not, so I had to look at my credit card bill. I didn't remember getting ready for bed, and I knew I'd thrown up but I couldn't remember where. It was at home. I called my mom on the landline and asked her to text my phone (in case someone found it), but sadly whoever found it turned it off and kept it. She said I sounded extremely drunk.

So, goodbye Iphone4s. I'm going to buy a new one tomorrow, but I really miss that phone, and all my data. I had backed it up on my desktop, but the application expired and I didn't pay the $10 to renew it...ugh.

It was also a bday gift from my ex husband, right after I moved out. 

The worst part is not having my calendar. I now have to make a lot of calls and ask "when were we meeting" or "when does this class start" etc. So frustrating.

Maybe I should just give up on dating for a while.

I recently had one guy, very good looking, who giggled during the entire date. Not just the beginning. On paper he was great, but I just couldn't get past that school girl nervous giggle -- yuck. We hung out for the whole night, at least 6 hours or so, and he giggled constantly. It was unnerving.

The thing is, I had at least 4-5 strong mixed drinks (one after the next -- I was drinking without a break the whole time) and ended with 2 shots (one right after the next), and I didn't throw up at all or feel sick in the slightest. I wasn't hung over the next day either. And of course I didn't lose anything, and I remember not really even acting drunk. I completely remember saying goodbye, getting in the cab, going home, etc.

So that's why I felt it was strange that 2 wines and a mixed drink (with food) would knock me out like that. 

The worst part was, at some point, I texted the guy (from the previous lipstick-the-wasn't-mine story), and I told him that I'd read his Yelp reviews, and realized (from his review of a bar he was at on a date w/ some blonde girl) that he'd picked me up immediately after leaving a previous date -- it made me mad because he was complaining he was working and studying a lot, and said "he couldn't read another page, so let's hang out," and I HATE lies.

So here I am texting him super late at night, and then I lost my phone, so I don't even know what his reaction was. I do remember he texted that he wrote a bunch of reviews at one time, so the date was a few weeks before, but who knows.

I don't even care about him seeing others, since I told him early on that I didn't want to be exclusive with him (I just don't think he's a long term match), so there's no reason for me to even be upset about the Yelp thing, except for the dishonesty. He could have said he was out with "a friend" or whatever. I just can't stand lies. I was planning on ending it for a while, but I guess this is a good excuse to.

I also lost the phone numbers of all of the guys I was talking to. Luckily, there weren't any in there that I was that excited about, but if there were, that would have been horrible. Because what would I do, text them and say, "Oh, were you planning on asking me out again? Because I've lost my phone. If not, carry on and have a nice life." LOL.

Ugh.

At least I have my land line phone. And thank God I didn't lose my keys, because I have no way to get in if that happens. I should really find a key-friend to keep a set I guess. And my mom sent me a cool colander/strainer thing.

I'm really enjoying my gym classes though. The kangaroo spring shoes one is pretty amazing. After 3 times going, I can finally not need to take breaks...before I had to take about 4!

I took a break from working on the panic attacks, but need to get back into that. I'm thinking of just going and standing on the subway platform, until I can get the guts to get on an local train and just go 1 stop. My fear is that the car would get stuck (before I can work up to longer times). But we'll see i guess.

Hopefully if I can do that, I can conquer trains, and then work up to planes, which I can't even imagine doing at this point. It's been almost 2 years since I've been home, and it makes me dizzy to even think about. I really miss it, and it's strange to feel like I "can't" go, so I really need to conquer this.

But on the plus side, match is using some of my advice in an upcoming article that will come out in several months. Strange anyone would take my advice when my life is so ridiculous right now, but I'm still very thankful for it. And I'm also thankful to have my mom to call drunk in the middle of the night when I've lost my phone.

Maybe I should just stop drinking. I don't even really even like it. It's just what people do here when they go out. I really hate having a headache the next day. Maybe I'll do a cleanse diet or something. 

Hopefully these posts will stop being so depressing soon!